Goodbye

Home is the place we want to be when we're anywhere else.. but when we're stuck at home we'd like to be anywhere but. 

I leave for vacation in the morning/early afternoon. I'm extremely excited and ready to head out of town and get away from the craziness of work, cars, full house of people... except that we're going out of town with all the crazies who live in the house... I guess I just find it funny. To escape the crazy we just move the crazy from a house in the suburbs to a house on a lake. But hey, whatever works?

I'm about to leave, and I'm rather sad. I'm going to miss the goodbyes for several very important people. I missed the goodbyes for several important people already. Work, crazy-house full of people, and being tired all joined forces to make the goodbyes fly right past me. There is one goodbye that I won't be missing, but I won't know how to say when it comes. I won't know what to say, and so this is what I can say.

So.. here are my goodbyes. I guess it's best on here since I'd cry in person (probably crying anyways).

To Name Twin:
I miss you already. I miss your crazy energy and your most reassuring hugs. I miss being able to tell you anything in the comfort of our Caribou while you drink your tea and I drink my coffee. I miss sitting by the fire and just unloading all of our baggage talking about family, boys, and school. I hope to get your glittery mail and stressed out (though non-stressed would be amazing too) Skype calls when nothing seems to be working right or our hair just isn't cooperating.

To Palokangasaurus:
I missed saying goodbye to this year with our rules for the school year. So, to replace the verbal rules, they're here. Written in stone.
1. No Dying (Duh.)
2. You have to get out of that apartment every once in awhile.
3. Make friends (Be Brave).
4. Skype me always. When you're bored, when you're studying, whenever.
I wish we saw each other more this summer. I miss your hugs and talking to you about everything. I miss biking with you and being able to just full out explode when even the littlest things make me mad. Internet and skyping is not the same, but obviously we have to settle for it. I miss you. Skyping today was fun, minus my crappy interwebs. We will talk again soon.

To Peaches:
I didn't want to let go when we were saying our half-goodbye. I didn't want to let go because I don't want to lose you again this year. We've worked so hard to get it back to normal that I'm so afraid it's going to go away again. I know we won't let it.. but that's my biggest fear. Is that we start to drift away. We will skype every Monday or whatever day works best. I am going to miss you so much. There's no one else who I can say every bitchy judgmental comment to, and there's no one I'd rather wander MOA or Burnsville Center with. Last night was a great way to end our summer, bubbles, music, and (you know..). I wish we were closer than 5 hours apart because when we're falling apart, the pillow in the lap and the brushing of hair is the best medicine. I want to be able to do that when you're freaking out about OChem and Biology. I want to be there, and not being able to is really hard. It's going to be really hard.

To my honeybee:
I won't say goodbye. I can't. We'll be just fine. We both know that. But, waking up alone and being far away when there's nothing I want more than your reassuring hugs or calming voice is going to make this semester very hard. All the butterflies when you squeeze my hand or whisper in my ear, they will be waiting restlessly for our weekends. The three hour drive between us will be the longest and most awaited drive each time we separate or come together. I already hate 35 because I know it's going to be what separates us. I'm not ready. I'm not even close to ready. I love you to the moon and back, but I will never say the word goodbye to you.  It's not goodbye.. it's just see you in a few weeks. 



I move into my apartment September 1st. You can expect more regular (either daily or every other day) postings. Until then, goodbye blog! Return to me in two weeks ;) 

Always,
H.Eilene